my lap top now really gone ....don't feel like explaining the procedure anymore,its tedious and i seriously got no mood. i can no longer go to penang with my friends and that i have to work doubly harder right now....i am so sick of myself. i got no time and energy to be bothered about other things anymore,i am just making myself a sadist.
the handphone thing has been a tragic experience and a huge emotional blow for me and now a financial bomb. i am seriously sick of many things le.i have got no will to do things anymore le.i am turning selfish and serious.now is that a good or a bad thing? one blow after another,i am not made of steel...i am human too.....lao tian ye ye,you forgot about me???you know ar,qian ar....how can you forget about her???she is suffering and needs your help desperately.where are you when i need you the most??you are gone.and it feels like you are never coming back.so what happens to me if you decided to be gone???will you at least say goodbye to me???tell me if you are gone ok?and i will start to build defenses around myself and block the harm from coming in.
i can only sleep to distress, to run away,to relax in some place you do not know of.and now,even sleep is taken away from me.why do you haunt me???what is it that you want from me??
why cant you just made me a happy person? why must you give me this?why must i go through this?a blow after another.let me off please, i cant turn to anyone for help coz no one understands,they say they know it but how much do they know??they are only guessing,they don't even understand themselves,how can they know me???do they even know what i am worrying about? i doubt so.its so contradicting,i don't want them to know.
but i seriously thank my friends for their efforts.kent thanks lei~!jeremey thanks lei~!ri xian thanks lei~!shi kai thanks lei~!trudy thanks lei~!thank you ar!
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